Cont.
“When we think about that, there is no other racial or ethnic group in which those ideas come to bear on someone’s politics,” said Banks, who gathered data for her book by traveling to black hair salons across the country. “No one is saying that about white women, Asian women or Latino women.”
Erin Aubry Kaplan, who wrote an article about Michelle Obama’s hair and its implications for Salon.com, believes the first lady’s straightened and perfectly coiffed style helps her image.
“She has been criticized about many things, but I think that underneath the criticism about her being radical or too outspoken about race is this uneasiness people have about her being this tall, dark-skinned woman,” Kaplan said. “So her hair is important, because if she is tall, dark-skinned and has an Afro then she becomes really scary.”
Let me tell you…I have personally contemplated why a woman so confident, and so intellectually stimulated has chemically relaxed hair. I wanted to know what fueled her decision to stay on that pattern – I am certain she weighed the options. How am I certain? Because behind education and knowledge, especially thorough knowledge of African-Amerian history, comes the realization of the implications such a decision has on you – from hair to urban wear. I hope it wasn’t to appear to be less-intimidating though. In fact, I find it genuinely insulting that someone would assume that her hair and her daughter’s hair is a part of the political agenda – intentionally avoiding frightening other races.
I hear aaaaallllllll the time that hair isn’t as big of an issue as I make it when I discuss it with family and friend’s who warned me in the beginning not to start my transition. And I understand their warnings – because had I been more busy at the time, with less time to contemplate my meaning of life…I would have never considered it. And because I never would have considered it, then I never would have started noticing the hurt that actually tormented me, and people around me. Everyone tries to deny that it’s “that serious,” but I’ve personally seen most of them struggle with their self-image because of their hair.
“It was really surprising to me because I was so afraid what people would think about them and I didn’t think I would feel that way,” Johnson said [about her decision to get kinky twist]. “Whenever I would get my hair done, I would get straight styles and I did not know if people would think that the kinky style was pretty.”
“When a child has straight hair, they are told they have ‘good hair’ and while people aren’t telling children with curly hair that they have ‘bad hair,’ in essence that is what you are saying because you are saying that straight hair is good hair,” Valdez-Simeon said. “I try to explain to people that good hair is not straight hair, it’s healthy hair,” said Valdez-Simeon, who also said all of the comments [about her bi-racial daughters’ “good hair”] have come from African-Americans.
I personally remember my white roommate one year, who had all black friends telling me as we walk to get dinner together, “you know why I’m glad I’m not black, Tifanei?”
“Why, ________?”I don’t bother to put my defensives up, assuming she was planning on making a corny joke.
“because, I have good hair,” she says ….…I should have put my defensive up… After she said that, I just stuttered and tried to pointlessly defend my ‘good’ hair that was relaxed and breaking off at the ends.
I remember another time a white female, with long unkempt straggly-looking hair telling me that she didn’t like black women’s hair, because it’s so “hard.” Now I assume she was simply referring to the up-dos. And again, instead of defending black women in general I defended my ‘good’ hair. I walked away thinking “how the hell could anyone who keeps their hair looking like she does, tell me that someone else’s hair isn’t good enough?”
I could really go on… last weekend, at the Legally Blonde Musical that I took my sister to see. All of the prominent black women in the play had weaves and flow-y straight “good hair.” Except for one…the black female that was a part of the– and I quote – “boring, ugly, and plain” student’s at Harvard Law, she had a hair style that resembled an afro. Hey…at least they depicted her as the intelligent one right?
We get no breaks….okay; I’m done with the examples. You should get why it’s still an ‘issue’ and at least understand how if you’re a black woman today and that’s all you hear and see…you end up one of two ways, in denial or like me…pissed off that anyone had you deny that nappy beauty in the first place. And If I’ve exhausted you, think about how I feel when I just look around…
I’m so proud of the man and woman, raising the black daughter for honoring that her hair is in fact beautiful in its natural state.
I have seen many adopted African Americans who either :
(a) Have horribly unkempt hair or
(b) Unnatural hair
I too went through feeling ashamed of my hair when I was growing up. Especially since I was put in a lot of situations where I was the only non-white in my school/neighborhood/town (besides my immediate family of course).
I am Native American too, so my hair seems to be especially hard to manage. But I’m not ashamed and I’ve learned to embrace it more. I love my hair!